Author Michael

Where Will You Go After You Die? A Reformed Perspective on Eternity, Judgment, and Hope

Michael Leave a comment

Every second, two people die — stepping into eternity forever. What happens after death? Discover the sobering truth from Scripture and the hope of salvation through Christ alone.

Credits: Externally sourced content, reviewed and approved for publication.

Where Will You Go After You Die?

“It is appointed for man to die once, and after that comes judgment.” – Hebrews 9:27

Every second, about two people die somewhere in the world — roughly 120 per minute and 173,000 per day.
(Source: Statistics Times, “World Birth and Death Rates,” updated 2025, https://statisticstimes.com/demographics/world-death-and-birth-rate.php.)

By the time you finish reading this, nearly 200 people will have stepped into eternity — some into everlasting joy, others into everlasting judgment.

Death does not discriminate. It does not wait for retirement or respect youth. You can be 18 or 88, in perfect health or nearing your final breath — the result is the same:

“You return man to dust and say, ‘Return, O children of man!’ … So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom.” – Psalm 90:3,12

The statistics are staggering, but the truth behind them is more sobering: your days are numbered by God. Every heartbeat, every sunrise, every conversation is one step closer to the day when you will meet Him face to face.

The Inescapable Appointment

The Bible is painfully clear: “It is appointed for man to die once, and after that comes judgment” (Hebrews 9:27).

There are no do-overs, no reincarnations, no “see you on the other side to make it right.” The moment your soul leaves your body, your eternal destination is sealed forever.

Jesus Himself said:

“The hour is coming when all who are in the tombs will hear His voice and come out — those who have done good to the resurrection of life, and those who have done evil to the resurrection of judgment.” – John 5:28–29

If you were to die tonight, would you stand before God as forgiven or condemned? That question is not morbid — it’s merciful. God tells you the truth now so you can respond before it’s too late.

A Story of Grace: Chuck Colson

Consider the story of Charles “Chuck” Colson — once known as President Nixon’s “hatchet man.” During the Watergate scandal, Colson was infamous for his political ruthlessness. But in 1973, a friend handed him Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis.

Late one night, Colson sat in his car, overwhelmed by conviction, and surrendered to Christ. He later said:

“I realized that for too long I had put my trust in myself alone, and the result had been a moral and spiritual emptiness.”

(Source: Prison Fellowship, “Watergate: The Glorious Defeat of Chuck Colson,” https://www.prisonfellowship.org/story/watergate-the-glorious-defeat-of-chuck-colson)

Colson’s conversion shook Washington and eventually led him to found Prison Fellowship, now the largest prison ministry in the world. He was once a man enslaved to pride and power — until Christ set him free.

“If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” – 2 Corinthians 5:17

Life Is a Vapor

In contrast, some people enter eternity without warning. In 2020, when Kobe Bryant’s helicopter crashed, the world stopped in disbelief. One moment, he was planning his daughter’s basketball game; the next, both their lives were over.

It doesn’t matter if you’re a celebrity or an unknown name — death arrives when you least expect it.

“You do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.” – James 4:14

Fame, wealth, and legacy can’t stop the clock. Death humbles every title, erases every trophy, and silences every boast. What will matter most when you stand before the throne of God is not who you were — but Whose you were.

Heaven or Hell — And No Middle Ground

A 2023 Pew Research Center study found that while 73% of Americans believe in heaven, only 62% believe in hell.
(Source: Pew Research Center, “Views on the Afterlife and Eternal Destiny,” November 15, 2023, https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2023/11/15/views-on-the-afterlife-and-eternal-destiny/)

Many imagine that “a loving God wouldn’t send anyone there.” But Jesus spoke more about hell than He did about heaven.

He called it a place “where their worm does not die and the fire is not quenched” (Mark 9:48), a place of “outer darkness” and “weeping and gnashing of teeth” (Matthew 8:12).

Hell is not the absence of God’s presence — it’s the absence of His mercy. It’s justice without grace.

Heaven, by contrast, is not a reward for good behavior but a gift for forgiven sinners who trusted Christ alone.

“For by grace you have been saved through faith — and this is not your own doing, it is the gift of God.” – Ephesians 2:8–9

How Can You Know You’re Saved?

Many people say, “I hope I go to heaven.” But the Bible doesn’t leave salvation up to hope — it offers assurance.

“Whoever hears My word and believes Him who sent Me has eternal life. He does not come into judgment but has passed from death to life.” – John 5:24

That’s not religion. That’s rescue.

Christ came to bear the punishment your sins deserve. On the cross, the wrath of God fell on Him so that grace could fall on you. When He rose from the dead, He conquered death — not in theory, but in history.

Your only hope is to be united to Him by faith.

Your Urgent Call

Friend, this is not a message to file away for later. Every tick of the clock echoes eternity.

“Now is the favorable time; behold, now is the day of salvation.” – 2 Corinthians 6:2

Repent — turn from your sin and self-reliance. Believe — trust that Christ’s righteousness, not your goodness, is what saves.

Don’t gamble with your soul. Whether you’re 18 or 88, your days are numbered, and eternity will come faster than you think.

One Final Thought

If you died tonight, what would you say to God? What would He say to you?

Imagine standing before His throne and hearing one of two voices — either “Well done, good and faithful servant,” or “Depart from Me, I never knew you.”

That’s not drama. That’s destiny.

Don’t wait for someday — eternity is one heartbeat away. Believe. Repent. Live.

Should you ever remove a brother or sister from a small group or exclude them in any way?

Michael Leave a comment

Why am I writing this? Over the years, I’ve seen this issue come up over and over. Here are some things that have happened at different churches and different times-

Situation 1- A brother desires to join a Bible study and is excluded. The people in the Bible study proclaim it’s an exclusive Bible study and is not welcome.

Situation 2- A brother joins a small group and is told to leave the small group chat and not post about scripture or Christ.

Situation 3- A couple has been dating for a while and then breaks up. When they see each other in church, one party scuttles away, avoiding the other person.

Situation 4- A couple sisters have been really good friends for a while and are now intentionally avoiding each other at church.

Situation 5: A guy asks out a girl- This creates awkwardness and now the girl is avoiding the guy

People intentionally avoid each other at church. People can be exclusive. Is this ever okay? How are we to think through these situations? What are the principles?

As a general rule, we want to resolve the differences we have with people rather than harboring grudges. We want to have and develop a pattern of forgiveness over avoidance. There is a connection between forgiveness, and inclusion. Bitterness, unforgiveness, and grudges lead to disunity and avoidance. Forgiveness leads to kindness, unity and a tender heart.

Ephesians 4:30-32

And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all Bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

As a general rule, as our hearts delight in the Lord and who he is, we will desire what the Lord wants. The Lord wants us to witnesses for His Gospel as a Gospel community. A love that hates and avoids is foreign to the New Testament. There is no such thing a genuine sacrificial, agape love that avoids another believer. Avoiding people is what the world does. Some unbelievers operate on two principles- If I like this person I’ll love them back. If they don’t love me then I’ll avoid them. This is not Biblical love. This is a conditional based love. But Biblical love even loves one’s enemies!

Matthew 5:44- “But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”

What was Christ’s Example?

Romans 5:7-8

For one will hardly die for a righteous man, though perhaps for the good man someone would dare even die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

In addition, we are united in Christ; one body and one spirit.

We are one body. I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called, with all lowliness and gentleness, with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love, endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called in one hope of your calling; one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all.

We are one Body, members of one another. As a general rule, we should act as though we are one body, treating each other as God’s family. We ecnourage each other as we see the day drawing near (Hebrews 10:24-25) And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.

What about excluding someone from a small group?

Well one argument is that it’s a small group setting and everyone needs to feel comfortable if things are being shared. I’m not dismissing that argument. Here are some principles to consider:

  1. Is the context of the conversation so intimate that you have to exclude someone? Love should strive to include rather than disconnect someone from the brothers as a general rule with some exceptions
  2. People go through different seasons. This brother may only be connected to you and the small group. It’s possible that someone is disconnecting this brother from the only brothers this person has in his life. We know great preachers sin and are prone to fall. No one has arrived. What’s the trade off?
  3. If posting scripture in a small group chat offensive? We gain knowledge from pastors we don’t know all of the time and listen to them.
  4. As the body of Christ, we see patterns of mutual discipleship and encouragement- encouraging one another in the Word until we see the day drawing near

When I think of avoidance, I think of different categories-

  1. Situational. People avoid each other because of something the other person did to them. Asked them out, broke up in the relationship, gossip, slander, assumed motivations, the list goes on.
  2. Fixed items- Race, ethnicity, age, stage of life, intelligence, gender, rich/poor

So, should we ever avoid or exclude a brother or sister?

Do everything possible to not exclude a brother or sister especially if it’s a men’s bible study or women’s Bible study. I know there are exceptions. And some good exceptions. People will have different opinions. But I’ve seen too many people fall into egregious sin. Former regular attendees leave the faith. We never know what someone is going through. Stories of marriages imploding. These men or women didn’t have friends they could talk to and work out issues with. We need each other. Forgiveness leads to unity. Delight yourself in the Lord, love your enemies, follow Christ’s example, act as the body we are in Unity, doing everything we can to benefit the body and use our gifts. A good rule of thumb is to ask yourself this question- What is best for this person? Reconcile. Exclusion and avoidance of believers is not the type of love we are called to but a sacrificial, agape love as a Gospel community and Gospel witness. There is something deeply wrong with our hearts if we are avoiding other believers. When the world becomes more loving than the church, it can be enticing to leave. People will start wondering if anything has changed in these people’s hearts if the world loves them more than the people in the church. The Gospel is not just a message. It’s a life lived out authenticated by our love for one another. Forgiveness. Reconciliation. Love. Strive for the love of Christ and let him be our example

S.M.A.R.T. Goals

Michael Leave a comment

This is the Turkish shooter from the Olympics, earning a silver medal. Nonchalant shooting. He was so practiced, so adept, he didn’t need all of the “essential” equipment. He was just a natural shooter. He hit the target comfortably because he had developed long term habits. In the same way, as believers, we need specific goals and a plan to attain them. The following will provide a framework for why we should plan and how to plan as Bible Believing Christians.

What does the Bible say about planning well?

Verses on Working Hard:

  1. Proverbs 6:6-8 (LSB)
    “Go to the ant, O sluggard, observe her ways and be wise, which, having no chief, officer, or ruler, prepares her food in the summer and gathers her provision in the harvest.”
  2. Proverbs 10:4-5 (LSB)
    “Poor is he who works with a slack hand, but the hand of the diligent makes rich. He who gathers in summer is a son who acts wisely, but he who sleeps in harvest is a son who acts shamefully.”
  3. Proverbs 13:4 (LSB)
    “The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, but the soul of the diligent is made fat.”
  4. Proverbs 20:4 (LSB)
    “The sluggard does not plow after the autumn, so he begs during the harvest and has nothing.”
  5. Proverbs 26:13-15 (LSB)
    “The sluggard says, ‘There is a lion in the road! A lion is in the open square!’ As the door turns on its hinges, so does the sluggard on his bed. The sluggard buries his hand in the dish; he is weary of bringing it to his mouth again.”

Verses on Planning Well:

  1. Proverbs 6:6-8 (LSB)
    “Go to the ant, O sluggard, observe her ways and be wise, which, having no chief, officer, or ruler, prepares her food in the summer and gathers her provision in the harvest.”
  2. Proverbs 10:4-5 (LSB)
    “He who gathers in summer is a son who acts wisely, but he who sleeps in harvest is a son who acts shamefully.”
  3. Proverbs 24:30-34 (LSB)
    “I passed by the field of the sluggard and by the vineyard of the man lacking a heart of wisdom, and behold, it was completely overgrown with thistles; its surface was covered with nettles, and its stone wall was broken down. When I saw, I reflected upon it; I looked, and received discipline: ‘A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest,’ then your poverty will come as a robber and your want like an armed man.”
  4. Proverbs 21:5 (LSB)
    “The plans of the diligent lead surely to advantage, but everyone who is hasty comes surely to poverty.”
  5. Proverbs 16:3 (LSB)
    “Commit your works to Yahweh, and your plans will be established.”

How are we to think through goals and planning for the future? Scripture calls us to work hard, to plan well, but to also trust in the Lord. We can’t do anything from our own hand- God can change the course of our life in an instant. It is by His power that we are even breathing one more breath right now. What does scripture say about our dependence upon Him?

John 15:5 (LSB)

“I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing.”

Zechariah 4:6 (LSB)

“Then he said to me, ‘This is the word of Yahweh to Zerubbabel saying, “Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,” says Yahweh of hosts.'”

It is God’s Spirit that gives us the power to do anything- Not by human strength.

So Scripture calls us to three things-

  1. WORK HARD

2) Plan Well

American Central Command Chief Norman Schwarzkopf points to a troop position that was 150 miles outside of Baghdad the evening of Feb. 24th during a press briefing in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia on Wednesday, Feb. 27, 1991. General Schwarzkopf said had the mission been to take Baghdad, nothing could have stopped them at that point. (AP Photo/Greg Gibson)

3) Depend on the Lord

With that being said, what is one way we can make a Smart Goal? What is a smart Goal?

Maybe you want to read the Word more. The following can be an example-

Specific:

I will read the Bible for 20 minutes every morning at 6 a.m. before starting my day.

Measurable:

I will complete at least one chapter from the Bible each day, keeping track of my progress with a Bible reading plan (such as the Gospels or Psalms) and marking off the chapters read.

Achievable: (Can you practically do it?)

I will set an alarm for 5:55 a.m. to ensure I wake up on time and set out my Bible the night before to avoid distractions. This will help me develop the habit of starting my day in God’s Word.

Relevant: (Motivations)

Reading the Bible daily at 6 a.m. aligns with my desire to deepen my relationship with God, grow spiritually, and start my day focused on His guidance.

Time-bound:

I will commit to this goal for 30 days to establish a consistent routine, then evaluate my progress at the end of the month to continue building on this habit.

Conclusion

As believers, we are accountable to God for our Time, Talents, and Resources. Without making goals and being fully dependent upon God, it will be hard to get our work done and give God glory. We need to make goals for every area of our lives. Think through how you are using your time for the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:31)

Potential Categories for SMART GOALS

Finances, career, friends, sanctification, college, being in the Word, praying, finding a spouse, giving God glory, motivations, serving in the church.

Psalm:90 devotional

Michael Leave a comment

                                                          Psalm:90 Devotional

                                                            Introduction 

          “I can repent tomorrow.” These are the words spoken of the searching. The simple minded. Especially the young. They say I can live my life now, live for myself and then make a decision. I want my sin. I want to live my own life. I want to put something other than Christ first.The reality of the situation is that we could die today. We could die tomorrow or in 70 years. We say we can repent tomorrow and then go into judgment for the rest of eternity. By that time it’s too late. It’s like the 5 virgins who weren’t ready. They were foolish saying we will be prepared tomorrow. Then the door is shut. There isn’t a second chance. They lived their life following the Father of a different kingdom and that’s where they are going- To the abode of their true Father.

Party life

Do you live to go to parties, get drunk, have sex, do drugs, and live for yourself? Or do you live for Him who died and was raised from the dead? I’m not saying it’s a sin to go to a party depending on what type it is. I’m not saying the people below are sinning necessarily. The overarching question is- What are you living for?

It is God who has allocated the amount of time here on Earth for a specific purpose- To be a witness for His Gospel and accomplish his purposes. God could take us out of this Earth at any time. But he has work for us  to do here on Earth. There is a harvest and there are seeds to be planted on the hearts of men. 

         It was Johnathon Edwards who said Lord, please stamp Eternity on my eyeballs. He wanted to live his last hour for the lord. In fact, that was part of one of his 70 resolutions. “Resolved, never to do anything, which I should be afraid to do, if it were the last hour of my life.” 

                                                              Backdrop

In order for us to more fully understand Psalm 90, we need to understand Psalm 89 briefly. The people of God are singing the first 37 verses of Pslam 89 through blinding tears. We are told the last king of Israel saw his own children put to death and his eyes were put out. He was taken to Babylon to live captive in the King’s court. The final memory of his sight was the death of the line of David. The children of Israel are taken into captivity with him. Have the promises of God to David and Israel Failed? This is the prevailing question. Can we trust God? 2 Samuel 7 promises there would be descendants from David’s line forever. Israel would always be in the land. There is now no King in Isarael and Israel is in Exile. 

  Everyone is asking- Have your promises to David and to Israel failed? 

Sometimes we don’t understand what God is doing. It looks like God may be going back on His promises. But we know that’s not possible and we continue trusting despite the trials of Life. 

                                                      Backdrop Psalm:90

Psalm 90 is the first Psalm. It is a prayer of Moses, the only prayer of Moses. They are in the wilderness. This is the wilderness generation directed to go to the promised land. But they never make it. They are just going in circles.This was a generation that squandered opportunities if ever a generation did.The wilderness became a graveyard. Moses conducted more funerals than most people in human history.  It is a theocentric Psalm leading us to God. We see Israel’s repeated unfaithfulness and God’s subsequent punishment. Aren’t we like that sometimes in this life? Psalm:90 presses us to think through who God is and who we are in light of God’s Character. 

1-2 God. We see the tension between Man’s fragility and God’s eternality

3-6 we see the brevity of life

7-11 Death, sin wrath, and their relationship to eachother

12-17 we see grace. 

                                     Reading Portion

1-2

Lord, you have been our dwelling place in all generations.

Before the mountains were brought forth or ever you had formed the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting, you are God.

                  Lord is our dwelling place- Moses can’t say canaan is our dwelling place, the promised land. Moses never saw canaan. But he knows the true dwelling place. It is the Lord, our sanctuary. Our temple. The Lord is our true refuge in light of trials and tribulations. We can always go to him. 

                Mountains- Bring our attention toward God. The creator was before the creation. And we are accountable to Him.

               Everlasting to everlasting- Notice what he doesn’t say. From beginning to end. There never was a day when God wasn’t. It’s Isaiah 57:15 which says – “For thus says the One who is high and lifted up, who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy” 

3-6 The Brevity of Life

             You return man to dust and say, Return, O children of man! For a thousand years in your sight are but as yesterday when it is past, or as a watch in the night.

Emphasizes the tension of human life- The fragility of human life in contrast to the eternality of a God who does not change. 

Watch in the night- Ashnurah; Length of time during the night when most people are asleep and unaware. Death will come quickly. 

You sweep them away as with a flood; they are like a dream

God has a claim on our life. He decides when we will be swept away. Historically, there used to be massive walls of water that would sweep everything in the path of a flood of way. It symbolizes death and destruction at the hand of an almighty God. 

Dream- Like Yesterday. Drams come and Go. 

Like grass that is renewed in the morning; in the morning it flourishes and is renewed; in the evening it fades and withers

This echoes Solomon in Ecclesiastes 1:2- Vanities of Vanities or meaningless- Hevel! Hevel- Like a puff of smoke that disappears soon. 

Vs7-11 Death, sin and their relationship to one another

For all our days pass away under your wrath; we bring our years to an end like a sigh. The years of our life are seventy, or even by reason of strength eighty, yet their span is but toil and trouble; they are soon gone, and we fly away.

Who considers the power of your anger, and your wrath according to the fear of you?

 The chastening hand of God is heavy upon the Israelites. The people of God are under God’s Chastening Rod. This is God’s anger unleashed as a result of human sin. God judges unrepentant sinfulness.

It’s not just that life is brief. Death is here because of our sin. We see the connection of how Misery and death is tied to sin. And we are to hate sin more than its consequences and acknowledge that God is indeed just. 

Vs 12-17 the grace of God; This section expects submission to God in light of who he is and the time we have left here on Earth. 

So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom

     God has allocated a number of days for us to do His work. And then comes the judgment. Are we faithful and living wisely or as the fool who says I have 40 more years left in this left? I’m going to wait to do God’s work or I’m going to wait to repent? The time to do God’s Work is now. Once time is gone it’s lost forever. The people in hell would give anything to have one more chance to repent. But their time is gone. 

Return O Lord! How long?

Have pity on your servants! Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days.

Satisfy us in the morning- Those satisfied by God from the moment they wake can withstand adversity.

Loyal love- Implies that grace or loyal love, not wrath, reflects God’s character. 

Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us, and for as many years as we have seen evil. Let your work be shown to your servants, and your glorious power to their children. Let the favor of the Lord our God be upon us, and establish the work of our hands upon us; yes, establish the work of our hands!

General obedience and faithfulness to God in light of who he is and the time we have left. 

True wisdom is manifested by living in light of eternity? How long O Lord until you return? Thankfulness in light of who he is and want to be obedient and faithful in light of his coming back. 

End with this- 2 Corinthians 5:14- For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: That one has died for all, therefore all have died; and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for Him who for their sake died and was raised.

                                                          Conclusion

             Sometimes we are like the wilderness generation. We don’t know what God is doing. It seems like He’s not fulfilling his promises in light of the circumstances. We ask why am I going through this trial? But we know that his promises will always come to pass. That He is the eternal God who is holy sovereign over our lives and time on this earth. He is the one who punishes death but also has a loyal love (Hesed). Christ is the personification of wisdom. True wisdom is found in the cross but it is foolish to men. Let us live in light of Christ, the personification of Wisdom, in light of who Christ is, in light of the amount of time God has allocated to us and say with Paul to live is Christ and to die is Gain. 

                                                    Psalm:90 Devotional

                                          Lord, Teach us to number our days 

                                     Lord, please stamp Eternity on my eyeballs

   “Resolved, never to do anything, which I should be afraid to do, if it were the last hour  of my life.” 

                      Paul- For me, to live is Christ and to die is gain (Philippians 1:21) 

  1. Moses never saw the dwelling place of Canaan but the Lord is our true _______________ place
  1. God has always existed from ________________  to  ___________________
  1. The flood, dream,and grass all symbolize the ____________ of life
  1. Psalm________ was the first Psalm written.

Reflection questions

  1. The wilderness generation was without a king and Israel was in exile- It looked like God’s promises wouldn’t come to pass. How do we react knowing God’s promises always come to pass but don’t know what God is doing in our lives at the moment? 
  2. Not living wisely with the time God has allocated us is robbing God of glory. How can we better steward our time and be on mission for why we are here- To be a witness to him and glorify His name? 
  3. What are you ultimately living for? While pursuing good things isn’t bad, living for them is idolatrous. Are you living for your job? A girlfriend/boyfriend? Or God and His purposes? 

2 Corinthians 5:14- and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died as was raised.

Networking and Expressing good desires

Michael Leave a comment

Credits: John Piper and my own study

Well we live in a culture of passive men that don’t know what they want. A single dating culture that isn’t dating. We need more men that know their identity in Christ. That know what they should be pursuing. More men that have a goal, know how they are going to pursue it, and follow through. Namely sanctification, a spouse, and living for the Gospel while praying and trusting in God’s providence. These are good things that God has ordained. Here are some more posts I’ve written on singleness.

single’s perspective https://forhisglory.net/2018/07/01/gift-of-singleness/,

singleness in the church https://forhisglory.net/2022/10/12/why-arent-christian-singles-getting-married/, and healthy interactions in the church https://forhisglory.net/2024/05/22/how-are-we-to-interact-with-the-opposite-sex/.

Age Differences

Age difference- Should we get married? B.C. Paper 2

However, in this post I want to change the topic to networking well to find a spouse.

Looking for a spouse can be looked down upon in the church. Finding a spouse is a good thing that can have a negative connotations. We are starting to call what is good evil and evil good. We are starting to take the ideology of the culture- That pursuing marriage is not good. That men shouldn’t be planning and making goals to find a spouse. The church is the context in which a spouse should be found. How should one go about finding a spouse? He who finds a wife finds a good thing. A good wife who can find? (Proverbs 18/Proverbs:31). In this short devotional, I’ll go over what one should be doing to find a spouse.

These are going to be short. I go much more in depth in the clickable posts above.

  1. Be a Godly person on fire for the Lord and the Gospel through being in the Word, serving others, loving others, edifying others.
  2. Have the right perspective of providence and singleness
  3. Check your heart and motives. (2 Corinthians 13:5)
  4. Live in light of eternity
  5. Make plans and goals to find a spouse.
  6. Qualified (Able to provide, elder attributes, etc)
  7. Serve in the church- Find someone that has the same heart for ministry that you do. To live for Christ and His Gospel.

After listening to a few sermons including John Pipers, I realized that there is another important one that I have never thought of before- Networking.

Let people in your inner circle know that you are trying to find someone. Let them know what you are looking for. Let some of the leaders you know so they can keep their eyes open for someone that might be a potential suitor. I’m by no means very good at this. It can be embarrassing, and I think there is wisdom in who you let know. Many marriages have come about through networking and conveying good desires so that singles can be on mission together for the Gospel. Some of us need people. God is sovereign and providential. At the same time, we are required to plan well, make goals, and trust God with the results. Pray with your brothers or sisters. Be dependent. Be the person that introduces others. It doesn’t have to be awkward. Set up a casual game night. And pray. Pray for a wife/husband. John Piper said he has prayed with many, many men and he can’t think of one that doesn’t have a wife right now. They networked. They prayed. They gave themselves to the church through service and love with the correct motive. And many found someone with the same heart and ministry for the Gospel. They represented the church as Christ loves the church. Live for the Gospel and see who is running with you. Whatever God provides, be the same person who is running well with the prize in sight.

The Singles Perspective-

Philippians 1:21 “For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.”

1 Corinthians 9:23 “I do it all for the sake of the gospel, that I may share with them in its blessings.”

Romans 14:23 “But whoever has doubts is condemned if he eats, because the eating is not from faith. For whatever does not proceed from faith is sin.”

Galatians 2:20 “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”

Romans 14:8 “For if we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord. So then, whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord’s.”

Colossians 3:3-4 “For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.”

2 Corinthians 5:14-15 “For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died; and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised.”

Matthew 16:24-25 “Then Jesus told his disciples, ‘If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.'”

Galatians 6:14 “But far be it from me to boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world.”

1 Corinthians 10:31 “So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”

1 Peter 4:11 “Whoever speaks, as one who speaks oracles of God; whoever serves, as one who serves by the strength that God supplies—in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ. To him belong glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.”